dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 30, 2020 14:11:22 GMT -5
This is Cogmeban, aka: "Bootstreams". The site contains a fairly typical Death Chasm opposite a small river. Remembering our problems in previous forts, re: Forgotten Beasts pissing acid into the faces of our Dorfs & homicidal chefs, I took the opportunity to channel out a sewer running from the river to the chasm: the artificial waterfall cascades right through the middle of the dining room / pub, simultaneously washing the vomit and acid off the poor Dorfs and cheering them up with a fine, calming spray of mist. Only one Dorf nearly drowned during the creation of this engineering masterpiece. He was displeased, but also managed to grind enough EXP during his near-drowning that he is the first Dorf in the history of the world that actually learned how to swim. Other noticeable features of the entrance to the fort include the ubiquitous trail of Dorf vomit coating the hallway and the standard DN-3000 Man Mincer blade trap located directly behind the trade depot. Above are The Halls Within. A new feature of Dwarf Fortress is fucking Bastards sneaking in to steal your shit. I have, after careful consideration, decided to counter this by turning our chapel - which houses a fucking Artifact Gem worth more than a thousand masterwork ☼Giraffe Steak Roasts☼ - into an actual bonafide Death Trap. God help the Kobold thief (two of which are currently located upstairs in the Corpse Stockpile) who tries to nick our shit. Rocks will fall. Everyone will die. Here we can also see the grubby hovels in which our Dorfs scratch their bollocks when off shift, the hospital staffed by the usual motley crew of cheese-makers and wood-workers. Stitches will be administered by leatherworkers: amputations will be the domain of the wood-cutter, chiefly because we only remembered to bring one axe with us. Let's have a look inside of the skull of a random Dorf. As we can see, Cookie the Third is 50% less psychotic than her immediate predecessors and will absolutely NOT be going on a MurderDeathKill rampage. We are also dealing with the problem of our Glorious Military spraying vomit all over the place every time they go outside; we are doing this by hiring human mercenaries. Our first squad is stationed in the entry hall and mostly consists of long-shanks, who - despite lacking the desired shortness and high biting stats inherent in the ethnically Dorfen - don't chunder when exposed to daylight. Finally, here we have the census of inhabitants. We've got a lot of fucking Baroness Consorts hanging about for some unknown reason: I'm sure that's because the civilization's health is fine and we're not drowning in fucking goblins, undead and refugees again. Absolutely fine.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 29, 2020 13:01:03 GMT -5
the word 'forum' comes from Rome, denoting a place of assembly where orators / demagogues / crazy fucks gathered to debate and speechify. So yah, nothing much has really changed there. Whereas the word 'IRC' comes from the French, denoting a place where retards / pedophiles / DW moderators gathered to flick sperm onto their keyboards and exchange fursuit cleaning tips.
'Chan' is, of course, Japanese in origin. We do not discuss the depravity that occurs there.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 29, 2020 12:51:45 GMT -5
100,001, you forgot joshmon is coofing himself to death atm.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 29, 2020 8:25:06 GMT -5
Here's the thing that made me take this shit seriously: fucking China shut down their infrastructure. Must be bad, China won't even shut down a fucking train if there are 20 school kids on the fucking tracks.
I think the people high up are (rightly) terrified of this fucking virus because it moves between species and mutates like a motherfucker. Every person / bat / dog it infects = another generation of virusy goodness = another roll of the mutation dice. If it rolls a natural 20, it becomes airborn aids and everyone dies.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 28, 2020 16:19:35 GMT -5
It's like you never left!
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 27, 2020 12:05:26 GMT -5
keep on getting @darknation'ed in that thread.
Bet you kids wish you were the sort of legend that Fraggle tells his girlfriend's children to make them behave and brush their teeth at night.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 27, 2020 9:40:06 GMT -5
Bring me your weak abused shivering masses Bring me the banned from thy liberal hordes We don't like doom and we don't like trannies So come and join the Doomer Boards
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 27, 2020 9:31:33 GMT -5
Actually had/have the disease (not sure if it's over yet), one of the twats who flew the coupe amongst us brought it here, it's like I vacuumed up clingfilm sometimes, other times it's like I snorted hair gel, either way it isn't pleasant. Still alive bro?
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 25, 2020 17:28:21 GMT -5
fuck this shit. No pub, no university, sitting in the house all day like a fucking neet scratching my balls and watching a bunch of suicidal boomer fartbags claw their way around coronatown on their fucking zimmer frames begging for death to claim them.
Come friendly COVID. Purge this putrid Earth.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 21, 2020 9:58:35 GMT -5
da fuq sort of doom are you people playing these days? Where's my fucking shotgun?
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 20, 2020 12:37:59 GMT -5
Whelp, I'm under quarantine. And the new DF version is released.
Prepare your anuses people. DN-DF 2020 is coming. This will be the most epic season yet.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 15, 2020 10:40:36 GMT -5
thing is that kids are horrible little pox vectors; snotty, retarded petri-dishes who act like they are allergic to soap. They *will* get infected, and Granny is dead meat the second the little bastards cough anyplace near her.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 15, 2020 7:26:34 GMT -5
Get güd bro.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 15, 2020 7:23:43 GMT -5
aaaaaaand that's the university shut down as well. Long distance learning only, which would be fine if the uni IT department weren't a bunch of monging howler monkeys chewing on the cords of the server and flinging shit everywhere.
If they shut down the pub I swear to god I will kill a man.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 14, 2020 19:02:47 GMT -5
this is the sort of thinking that brought us KDITZD.
Shotgunning barons is a holy work, and you should learn to appreciate it. Get in their face and get ready for twitch left/right combat. They are a boss-creature for a reason.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 14, 2020 18:59:07 GMT -5
At the risk of being racist; -
Never
Ever
Be employed by a Chinese company. For the reasons noted above. They do not treat their staff as human. We are merely insects dancing to the tune of a queen, and are doomed to die in her defense.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 14, 2020 16:38:06 GMT -5
I lost my fucking job because of this corona bullshit. Was working in a hotel owned by our glorious chinese overlords. No bus tours = no work.
Got paid about £105 in redundancy, was given six days notice, was told I was redundant over facebook messaging. So yeah, corona-chan has kinda fucked me.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 14, 2020 9:18:27 GMT -5
1% fatality rate is still pretty bad, if everyone on this board became infected, 2 of us would die Best case scenario.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 11, 2020 5:28:56 GMT -5
glorious work gentlemen.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 2, 2020 9:11:11 GMT -5
I'm game if the timezones work out.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Mar 1, 2020 7:24:08 GMT -5
wb bro.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Feb 27, 2020 7:23:59 GMT -5
e1m8 is clearly the superior music track and all other opinions are objectively wrong.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Feb 7, 2020 15:17:08 GMT -5
Interesting stuff about this pantheon of celestial Doomguy crap we're getting served. Bit drunk, so might spitball this one through.
Greek theater (which is really the basis for all western story-telling) revolved around Gods and people at the top of the food-chain (and interactions / shagging between the two) for a couple of reasons. First, because the normie shit-heeled helot lived a fucking boring life. Second, because the normie shit-heeled helot feels better about his life if his social superiors are portrayed as a bunch of lying, cheating, murderous backstabbing swan-fucking scumbags. Makes for a better story, yo. Popular appeal.
That pretty much continued thru Shakespeare up until the Modernists decided that Gott ist Tot and started desperately looking around for something to replace Him with / someone else to blame. Storytelling then turned to The Life and Times of Boring Ordinary Pleb as they scrabbled about internally to find a fucking reason for this shit existence, since God is no longer around and Hitler hasn't happened yet. Of course, it turned out that plebs still have a rubbish existence that no one wants to hear or read about, so in order to string meaning through what is essentially a meaningless life they ironically equated said plebs (and their actions) with the characters (and their actions) in religion or ancient mythology, e.g a masturbating jewish cuckold becomes synonymous with Odysseus and Jesus. Don't knock it, it's actually a pretty good read.
From this fixation with the self (and the boring minutiae and daily chores that make up the inner-landscape of the self) came the tradition of monologuing hard-boiled everyman heroes (film noir etc.) and - eventually, and mostly accidentally - story telling in FPS computer games. See, the free and indirect speech of modernist / hard-boiled fiction is basically designed to replicate the inner-dialogue that all us wonderful non-npcs have ongoing inside their skull. Since Doom has a story that is basically retarded and intrudes 0% upon the actual experience of, you know, playing the fucking game, players who wrap themselves up tend to have their own little inner-monologue going with themselves whilst playing. This - like Modernist free indirect speech - aids immersion. In non-wanky non-academic terms, it feels more *real*.
Or - and this is what people are getting pissed with and apparently struggling to articulate - you can take that ambiguity that forces your imagination to work with and participate and toss it in a dumpster, replacing it with fucking cutscenes about some bullshit Doomslay3r and his arch-angel buddies. See, when you're getting told how the story *is* rather than inventing it in your own head according to stimuli presented by the game, well, that means immersion is broken. We're not talking about you as director, writer and character in your own play anymore: you're just playing a part, a poor actor on a stage filled with farts and thunder.
Or you can disregard all that shit and just go with George Lucas syndrome, which is the manifestation of Idiot Retcon "no we wuz kings / Jedi all along but our heritage was just hidden" as opposed to telling the simple tale of poor-boy does good. Because - as in Greek Theater - it's impossible for poor people to do interesting things, especially after you've made a million dollars and made yourself an *actual* real life fucking King and need to justify your fat, lazy, gluttonous and stupid fatuous face to yourself in the mirror every day.
Where the fuck is my beer.
Anyway, that's it. Dunno about eastern story telling, I have no clue how that factors in. Since it culminated in fucking anime I'm going to assume their values and culture are worthless retarded trash and ignore it.
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Post by dn on Feb 3, 2020 7:25:31 GMT -5
There's essentially three evolutions for long-time Doom community people evidently; tranny weeaboo, metalhead libertine who opposes nothing and has no opinion, dry condescending technocrat douchebag. With our powers combined... /me shudders
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dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,736
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Random
Jan 16, 2020 7:33:46 GMT -5
Post by dn on Jan 16, 2020 7:33:46 GMT -5
Grading for my latest university essay: apparently I have a "cavalier disregard for proper academic form" and promptly got fucked out of ten marks for my numerous transgressions.
The good news is that my portfolio managed to score 56 out of a possible 60, so they can all wrap their tongues around my big purple cavalier helmet. Savour the flavour, bitches.
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