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Post by dangerousdaviebowie on Jul 6, 2023 0:07:30 GMT -5
I have never wanted to physically harm myself when I had the thought of "I like big maps and I can't lie" pop in my head. I feel ashamed for this thought so much.
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Post by ass-Klappin superfreaK enjoyer on Jul 6, 2023 8:00:43 GMT -5
I always get nervous when people who seemingly hate you do a favor for you.
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shibainumaster
Doomer
Kombucha Mushroom person (sits around all day)
Posts: 420
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Post by shibainumaster on Jul 8, 2023 2:55:49 GMT -5
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Post by deathevokation on Jul 8, 2023 10:28:13 GMT -5
bottom one looks like a cat we once had, cute stuff.
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shibainumaster
Doomer
Kombucha Mushroom person (sits around all day)
Posts: 420
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Post by shibainumaster on Jul 9, 2023 23:36:22 GMT -5
Nice.
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Post by MegaPancakeStrategist on Jul 11, 2023 3:02:56 GMT -5
I've been a quarter-century old for a little while now and I've come to the conclusion that I'll only get crazier from here. I'm not letting it end like this. NOT. LIKE. THIS.
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CittyKat112
Doomer
Kitty cat one hundred and twelve
Posts: 640
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Post by CittyKat112 on Jul 11, 2023 15:59:45 GMT -5
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nnnvork
Doomer
Nom-nom Chomsky
Posts: 542
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Post by nnnvork on Jul 14, 2023 14:16:53 GMT -5
I've been a quarter-century old for a little while now and I've come to the conclusion that I'll only get crazier from here. I'm not letting it end like this. NOT. LIKE. THIS. yeh. 20's are a very explodey time for a lot of people, they were for me. now i mostly vibe on drunken twunk monk energy, (wouldn't necessarily recommend drinking tho). i recommend fishing. 10/10 hobby that i should do more myself. i can't do it today tho because i fell asleep on my arm funny, and now it's disabled for a few days.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Random 2
Jul 16, 2023 5:26:25 GMT -5
via mobile
Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2023 5:26:25 GMT -5
As I approach the 20 maps completed in the past six months alone (2022 tally was 70 something), I'm beginning to wonder if Doom mapping is a good thing for my mental health.
By now I am pretty much removed from all social aspects of Doom (no discords, no forums but what little I post here, I even deleted my Doom twitter) yet I realize that, behind the simple fun of creation, there is a very real and very troubling craving for validation (by complete strangers, nontheless), recognition and dopamine that I can't seem to shake off - and, on top of it, for a game I don't even play anymore. I can't remember the last time I completed a wad.
Designing a situation that would get me banned from DW did help a bit (you know, in a 'broke up with your junkie gf that used to provide you crack' kind of way) but it wasn't enough. Every month I say 'this is the last DBP', 'I'm fed up with mapping for an audience that can't find its own thumb, let alone a secret' and yet I'm still here, month after month. I'm starting to feel like the battered bitch that just keeps coming back for more. I chalked up most of it to some mental issues and a general artist's temperament, something I always struggled with, but now I begin to wonder.
At what point do you just have to cut your losses, and realize that something that's fun is also harming you, stealing mental bandwidth that could be better used somewhere else? Part of me would like to go back to the late '90s (yes, I did some mapping back then, under a different name) where I'd just post on IRC my startan box and whatever - little to no comments, no likes to keep track of, no 'show your wip acreenshots' bs etc etc. But it ain't the 90s anymore, and I guess that, in short, I feel like I'm mapping for all the wrong reasons.
Tldr: get fucked
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shibainumaster
Doomer
Kombucha Mushroom person (sits around all day)
Posts: 420
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Post by shibainumaster on Jul 16, 2023 9:19:18 GMT -5
As I approach the 20 maps completed in the past six months alone (2022 tally was 70 something), I'm beginning to wonder if Doom mapping is a good thing for my mental health. By now I am pretty much removed from all social aspects of Doom (no discords, no forums but what little I post here, I even deleted my Doom twitter) yet I realize that, behind the simple fun of creation, there is a very real and very troubling craving for validation (by complete strangers, nontheless), recognition and dopamine that I can't seem to shake off - and, on top of it, for a game I don't even play anymore. I can't remember the last time I completed a wad. Designing a situation that would get me banned from DW did help a bit (you know, in a 'broke up with your junkie gf that used to provide you crack' kind of way) but it wasn't enough. Every month I say 'this is the last DBP', 'I'm fed up with mapping for an audience that can't find its own thumb, let alone a secret' and yet I'm still here, month after month. I'm starting to feel like the battered bitch that just keeps coming back for more. I chalked up most of it to some mental issues and a general artist's temperament, something I always struggled with, but now I begin to wonder. At what point do you just have to cut your losses, and realize that something that's fun is also harming you, stealing mental bandwidth that could be better used somewhere else? Part of me would like to go back to the late '90s (yes, I did some mapping back then, under a different name) where I'd just post on IRC my startan box and whatever - little to no comments, no likes to keep track of, no 'show your wip acreenshots' bs etc etc. But it ain't the 90s anymore, and I guess that, in short, I feel like I'm mapping for all the wrong reasons. Tldr: get fucked
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2023 9:38:06 GMT -5
As I approach the 20 maps completed in the past six months alone (2022 tally was 70 something), I'm beginning to wonder if Doom mapping is a good thing for my mental health. By now I am pretty much removed from all social aspects of Doom (no discords, no forums but what little I post here, I even deleted my Doom twitter) yet I realize that, behind the simple fun of creation, there is a very real and very troubling craving for validation (by complete strangers, nontheless), recognition and dopamine that I can't seem to shake off - and, on top of it, for a game I don't even play anymore. I can't remember the last time I completed a wad. Designing a situation that would get me banned from DW did help a bit (you know, in a 'broke up with your junkie gf that used to provide you crack' kind of way) but it wasn't enough. Every month I say 'this is the last DBP', 'I'm fed up with mapping for an audience that can't find its own thumb, let alone a secret' and yet I'm still here, month after month. I'm starting to feel like the battered bitch that just keeps coming back for more. I chalked up most of it to some mental issues and a general artist's temperament, something I always struggled with, but now I begin to wonder. At what point do you just have to cut your losses, and realize that something that's fun is also harming you, stealing mental bandwidth that could be better used somewhere else? Part of me would like to go back to the late '90s (yes, I did some mapping back then, under a different name) where I'd just post on IRC my startan box and whatever - little to no comments, no likes to keep track of, no 'show your wip acreenshots' bs etc etc. But it ain't the 90s anymore, and I guess that, in short, I feel like I'm mapping for all the wrong reasons. Tldr: get fucked Your jabs are no better than your maps I see.
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shibainumaster
Doomer
Kombucha Mushroom person (sits around all day)
Posts: 420
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Post by shibainumaster on Jul 16, 2023 9:58:50 GMT -5
Your jabs are no better than your maps I see. You of course, won a cacoward for your efforts, and perhaps, you have a right to say that - but at least, my maps aren't just copypasted shapes.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Random 2
Jul 16, 2023 10:01:22 GMT -5
via mobile
Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2023 10:01:22 GMT -5
Your jabs are no better than your maps I see. You of course, won a cacoward for your efforts, and perhaps, you have a right to say that - but at least, my maps aren't just copypasted shapes. True. If you copypasted shapes your maps would be much, much better than they are. Oh btw, how's the Doom Wiki treatin' ya? Your ass still burning?
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shibainumaster
Doomer
Kombucha Mushroom person (sits around all day)
Posts: 420
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Post by shibainumaster on Jul 16, 2023 10:06:44 GMT -5
True. If you copypasted shapes your maps would be much, much better than they are. Oh btw, how's the Doom Wiki treatin' ya? Doom Wiki is treating me normal, i think. Also: A map of yours: And now mine: Just shut the fuck up with those mapping quips, you're playing a losing game, lady-boy.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Random 2
Jul 16, 2023 10:08:59 GMT -5
via mobile
Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2023 10:08:59 GMT -5
True. If you copypasted shapes your maps would be much, much better than they are. Oh btw, how's the Doom Wiki treatin' ya? Doom Wiki is treating me normal, i think. Also: A map of yours: And now mine: Just shut the fuck up with those mapping quips, you're playing a losing game, lady-boy. Nah it's fun watching you seethe like the edgy kid you are. Heh, I knew it. Vulgarity, the last resort of those with no valid points. Thanks for proving me right
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shibainumaster
Doomer
Kombucha Mushroom person (sits around all day)
Posts: 420
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Post by shibainumaster on Jul 16, 2023 10:13:23 GMT -5
Heh, I knew it. Vulgarity, the last resort of those with no valid points. Thanks for proving me right You were not proven right. I've kinda shown that your mapping is lacking in quality compared to mine; But, where have i proven you right? You did not even have a coherent point to begin with.
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shibainumaster
Doomer
Kombucha Mushroom person (sits around all day)
Posts: 420
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Post by shibainumaster on Jul 16, 2023 10:22:25 GMT -5
That was, quite illogical, i guess the lady hormones are finally kicking in for @saltator .
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nnnvork
Doomer
Nom-nom Chomsky
Posts: 542
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Post by nnnvork on Jul 19, 2023 17:27:08 GMT -5
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nnnvork
Doomer
Nom-nom Chomsky
Posts: 542
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Post by nnnvork on Jul 24, 2023 9:31:38 GMT -5
I hope Cuppy isn't exploding too badly right now :/
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BIG DICK NIGGA
this post is a lie about my bodily proportions
Major Arlene obsessed, 100% verified freakazoid. AKA bzzrak
Posts: 2,296
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Post by BIG DICK NIGGA on Jul 24, 2023 12:28:43 GMT -5
Well idk about him but my asshole just exploded really badly
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Post by deathevokation on Jul 24, 2023 15:09:32 GMT -5
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40oz
diRTbAg
Posts: 5,536
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Post by 40oz on Jul 24, 2023 19:56:59 GMT -5
did you watch it? ive seen that video, its not what it looks like. (its dumb)
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Post by deathevokation on Jul 24, 2023 22:11:37 GMT -5
did you watch it? ive seen that video, its not what it looks like. (its dumb) aaahh, no I haven't... I can't press play on these things.
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Post by Herr Dethnout on Jul 25, 2023 4:08:57 GMT -5
There's now a meme on hispanic youtube that consist in literally upload the entire "The Flash" in HD...
The funniest part is that YouTube takes so long in removing it and people just keep uploading it. In fact, it appears in my recommendations frequently lol
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Post by MegaPancakeStrategist on Jul 26, 2023 13:14:53 GMT -5
I hope Cuppy isn't exploding too badly right now :/ Thank you for your responses and concern, I am fine-ish! Sorry for the worry but thank you again! I'm not ready to be back for real though, I'm just checking in! Rediscovered Internet fun surfing the web last night, rekindling flames: youtuube.neocities.org/homepage
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