Judgment Free Zone
Jan 10, 2018 14:25:04 GMT -5
Post by 40oz on Jan 10, 2018 14:25:04 GMT -5
Fuck your judgment free zone.
If you exist, you're being judged. Judgment free zones exist only in the land of nonexistence. You were probably judged as a child, you were definitely judged at some point today, and you will probably be judged in one way or another after you die. It happens to me too. You're judging me right now.
It doesn't matter.
You've judged people in the past, you probably judged people today. Just because people don't know about it doesn't mean you didn't do it. Perhaps you're not very happy about it. That's ok.
Everyone has flaws. Its what makes us relatable. We make fuckin mistakes once in a while. Sometimes very often or all the time. Whatever. So has everyone you know. If you have flaws, you have to own them. If you don't, people who don't like you can use them against you to hurt you in a very personal way. If that's what happens, that's your fault.
Accept that you have flaws and don't obfuscate them. Own them. If you really don't want to own them, then you need to work on yourself to fix them. Sometimes we bury these flaws so deep down that we shift our thinking to believe they don't exist and that we really are who we say we are. That shit will fuck you up.
People dislike hypocrisy and inconsistency. If you tell people you are one way and they find out that you're another, you're going to have a bad time. There's nothing wrong with who you are, whether you don't feel good about it or not. Every one of us is a work in progress, and perfect people are strange. They always seem like they're hiding something, and it puts people's eyes on them, waiting for them to slip up and drop their facade.
We've all done some shit in the past. I have too. I'm not happy about it. But neither of us can rewrite history.
1. I botched a sweet opportunity to be a part of a revolutionary community project called Doom The Way Id Did. I was really happy to be a part of it, but I was unhappy that as more people signed up to it, I didn't have as much influence over the direction the project was moving in. If I was wiser, I would have talked to some of these people directly and worked out our differences. Instead I pulled a stunt and publicly announced that I'm yanking my maps from the project and it's everyone's fault but my own. Not smart. Very ridiculous. I created a lot of instability in the project by doing that, and that wasn't fair to anyone. Not even myself.
2. I released a demo of UAC Ultra 2 on 04/20/2013. The project was less than my best work, and more of an experimental art piece and a substitute for my dropping out of DTWiD. Worse than that, the project date of the release was in line with the anniversary of the Columbine school shooting. In the final line of the release thread, I wrote "Happy Columbine School shooting day! KILL EM AAAAALLLL!!!" as a reference to the text file for UAC_LABS by Eric Harris. I'd be lying if I didn't do it for shock humor, but I also felt that the Doom community was far past this and I was making a statement to say that this doesn't effect us anymore. Obviously, it wasn't a very smart thing to do. I don't think my motivations for writing it were completely out of line, but there was definitely a softer way of going about it that probably wouldn't have pissed off a lot of people for no reason at all.
3. I inherited this forum, which isn't really a mistake by any means, but I think there's a pretty good handful of friends I've made through doomworld in the past that wouldn't like to see me making a case for why doomworld sucks these days. Many people really love doomworld and when I say I dislike doomworld, what they're hearing is that I dislike them. In a case by case basis, this is rarely true and most often not. In any case, I think a lot of people would have preferred I take their side against Dumbworld instead of joining it and becoming supreme emperor. Unfortunately, I'm a man of action and I really do stand by the mantra that having more than one doom community is better for Doom than worse.
I make more mistakes than that. Some are more obvious than others, but the majority of them aren't even very traceable through the internet forum. But whatever. I would have done things a little differently if I could, but I can't. And that's life. You can't hide from judgment.
If you exist, you're being judged. Judgment free zones exist only in the land of nonexistence. You were probably judged as a child, you were definitely judged at some point today, and you will probably be judged in one way or another after you die. It happens to me too. You're judging me right now.
It doesn't matter.
You've judged people in the past, you probably judged people today. Just because people don't know about it doesn't mean you didn't do it. Perhaps you're not very happy about it. That's ok.
Everyone has flaws. Its what makes us relatable. We make fuckin mistakes once in a while. Sometimes very often or all the time. Whatever. So has everyone you know. If you have flaws, you have to own them. If you don't, people who don't like you can use them against you to hurt you in a very personal way. If that's what happens, that's your fault.
Accept that you have flaws and don't obfuscate them. Own them. If you really don't want to own them, then you need to work on yourself to fix them. Sometimes we bury these flaws so deep down that we shift our thinking to believe they don't exist and that we really are who we say we are. That shit will fuck you up.
People dislike hypocrisy and inconsistency. If you tell people you are one way and they find out that you're another, you're going to have a bad time. There's nothing wrong with who you are, whether you don't feel good about it or not. Every one of us is a work in progress, and perfect people are strange. They always seem like they're hiding something, and it puts people's eyes on them, waiting for them to slip up and drop their facade.
We've all done some shit in the past. I have too. I'm not happy about it. But neither of us can rewrite history.
1. I botched a sweet opportunity to be a part of a revolutionary community project called Doom The Way Id Did. I was really happy to be a part of it, but I was unhappy that as more people signed up to it, I didn't have as much influence over the direction the project was moving in. If I was wiser, I would have talked to some of these people directly and worked out our differences. Instead I pulled a stunt and publicly announced that I'm yanking my maps from the project and it's everyone's fault but my own. Not smart. Very ridiculous. I created a lot of instability in the project by doing that, and that wasn't fair to anyone. Not even myself.
2. I released a demo of UAC Ultra 2 on 04/20/2013. The project was less than my best work, and more of an experimental art piece and a substitute for my dropping out of DTWiD. Worse than that, the project date of the release was in line with the anniversary of the Columbine school shooting. In the final line of the release thread, I wrote "Happy Columbine School shooting day! KILL EM AAAAALLLL!!!" as a reference to the text file for UAC_LABS by Eric Harris. I'd be lying if I didn't do it for shock humor, but I also felt that the Doom community was far past this and I was making a statement to say that this doesn't effect us anymore. Obviously, it wasn't a very smart thing to do. I don't think my motivations for writing it were completely out of line, but there was definitely a softer way of going about it that probably wouldn't have pissed off a lot of people for no reason at all.
3. I inherited this forum, which isn't really a mistake by any means, but I think there's a pretty good handful of friends I've made through doomworld in the past that wouldn't like to see me making a case for why doomworld sucks these days. Many people really love doomworld and when I say I dislike doomworld, what they're hearing is that I dislike them. In a case by case basis, this is rarely true and most often not. In any case, I think a lot of people would have preferred I take their side against Dumbworld instead of joining it and becoming supreme emperor. Unfortunately, I'm a man of action and I really do stand by the mantra that having more than one doom community is better for Doom than worse.
I make more mistakes than that. Some are more obvious than others, but the majority of them aren't even very traceable through the internet forum. But whatever. I would have done things a little differently if I could, but I can't. And that's life. You can't hide from judgment.
