Justince
Doomer
Professional Face-Puncher
Posts: 495 
|
Post by Justince on Mar 14, 2019 11:37:44 GMT -5
Here it is! Another American film classic, sure to be talked about and looked back upon fondly for years to come. But only if you were to read the comments at DW! Where people dishonestly decide to champion for a clear and present cash grab shitfest. Universal needed to hold onto a valuable film property, so just like previous legendary direct-to-video cinema like Lion King 3, Starship Troopers 2, or any dozen of Air Bud movies we get a bottom-of-the-barrel retread sci-fi channel budget piece of crap. Of course what superficial, vacuous film would be complete without a backlog of woke Tweets and on-set pictures to let the world know how inclusive and progressive this movie is?
Head on down to your nearest water treatment plant, break out the painted nerf guns and BMX body armor and you're ready for DOOM: ANNIHILATION!
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 14, 2019 12:18:51 GMT -5
That, that was fucking tacky shit.
A trailer is supposed to get you hype, get you into it, all that I saw was fucking airsoft and poorly delivered dialog, fucking hell Universal pull your shit together.
|
|
|
|
Post by thundercunt on Mar 14, 2019 13:39:21 GMT -5
they couldn't pick a better title than the one already used by an atrocious video game movie sequel
|
|
|
|
Post by optimus on Mar 14, 2019 14:44:24 GMT -5
The logo says DOOM ANNTHILATION.
I don't see any ants.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 14, 2019 14:53:20 GMT -5
Oh look, it’s one of those tax write off films.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 14, 2019 14:56:52 GMT -5
-
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 14, 2019 16:07:59 GMT -5
Gotta make the protagonist some lippy bitch because...TOXIC MASCULINITY!
|
|
GRUG
Doomer
30 year old boomer
Posts: 701
|
Post by GRUG on Mar 14, 2019 22:33:02 GMT -5
They already had a Doom movie which we all know sucked. But holy shit, look at that fucking like to dislike ratio on the trailer LOL 
EDIT: So apparently the protagonist is DoomGal, not DoomGuy... I guess this movie is progressive! Does this get the DW seal of approval? EDIT: (second edit) I'm going to laugh if this movie becomes a box office failure.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 15, 2019 1:02:37 GMT -5
My directionless rambling about the movie
The film looks like garbage and people saying they like it just to seem "woke" are retarded. It looks nothing like Doom should, for one thing. The outrage seems over the top (on reddit and twitter) though, Death Threats™ have even come into play. Who the heck was expecting anything but hot garbage, who could be bothered to even care at this point.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 15, 2019 5:03:22 GMT -5
Ugh. At least the first movie was fun to laugh at because it had The Rock and other big actors, so it was entertaining to see them participate in that trainwreck. But this one just looks bad in a very boring way.
|
|
Justince
Doomer
Professional Face-Puncher
Posts: 495
|
Post by Justince on Mar 15, 2019 10:59:43 GMT -5
I don't understand why people as intelligent as Quasar are hell-bent on defending this pile of shit. Everyone assumes no one has any taste or that nothing leaves any lasting impression on anyone. Don't like it? No, it can't be the terrible acting, the terrible special effects, or the terrible music. Instead let's start making baseless excuses why the trailer has bad music and sound. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Oh you're a NECKBEARD! That's why you don't like direct-to-video movies! That's the only logical position I guess. Thanks internet, it's like every grown adult on the planet suddenly regressed to acting like 7 year olds.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 15, 2019 12:15:35 GMT -5
POOL'S THREAD CLOSED GUYS
Is it a coincidence that shortly after this thread was made dw users got riled up and started to shitpost thus requiring the moderation to take action?
I don't think so, the otherwise civil and informative off-topic discussions that always happen on dw (  citation needed ) show that this is actually a ploy that you are taking to destroy the rival site. Doomer Boards BTFO how will you recover from this??
|
|
Justince
Doomer
Professional Face-Puncher
Posts: 495
|
Post by Justince on Mar 15, 2019 12:22:34 GMT -5
Oh it's easy to know what kind of threads will be shut down on DW. They usually are full of things like opinions. When a certain group are backed into a corner or can no longer intimidate people into saying what they want the thread is toast.
|
|
technician
Doomer
Internet Hate Machine
Posts: 269
|
Post by technician on Mar 15, 2019 13:21:40 GMT -5
'Cause Disney's Star Wars and Ms. Marvel were great works of art... Doom is inherently, outrageously, masculine. It's almost a celebration of it. That's why it had to go. If they are going to go with a female protagonist, couldn't they at least get one that can hold a firearm and not look stupid? Remember that hispanic chick from Aliens? She was a rather believable marine-like female. I liked her.
|
|
|
|
Post by thundercunt on Mar 15, 2019 13:31:09 GMT -5
maybe in the end we find out that the girl is olivia pierce and this is a prequel to doom 2016
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2019 5:44:40 GMT -5
Seriously, how is it a Doom forum when you can't even talk about the shitty adaptation WHICH IS ON EVERYONE'S MIND? Are people supposed to just pretend it doesn't exist? Something is very wrong about this.
|
|
|
|
Post by optimus on Mar 16, 2019 9:33:37 GMT -5
I am waiting for the moment Doom Eternal is out, if they kept the jokes/demon allegories around immigration and the discussion around it goes out of hand, what will it be? Closing the forum on the new game itself?
|
|
Justince
Doomer
Professional Face-Puncher
Posts: 495
|
Post by Justince on Mar 16, 2019 10:44:30 GMT -5
Seriously, how is it a Doom forum when you can't even talk about the shitty adaptation WHICH IS ON EVERYONE'S MIND? Are people supposed to just pretend it doesn't exist? Something is very wrong about this. The icing on the cake is if the movie received nothing but praise the thread would still be open, even though that would make it just as tiresome (if not more so) to read. How's that for discussion? |
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2019 12:20:07 GMT -5
Just read through the leaked storyline guys, I'm re-posting it here...
DOOM ANNIHILATION PLOT
A clandestine group of scientists at United Aerospace Corporation, a conglomerate created by evil capitalist oil barons, the NRA, and Jerry Falwell, has been researching teleportation technology. The group, composed entirely of cis-gendered white male Republicans of German and British descent, has discovered a way to open "portals" whereby matter can be instantly relocated from one point to another, circumventing the laws of time and space. Although this technology is extremely dangerous and largely untested, the scientists foolishly forge ahead, funded by the evil American military which only wants to find new ways to kill brown people.
But the UAC's meddling with the sacred laws of nature results in the opening of a portal straight to Hell, and once opened none of the bumbling binary traditional pronoun-using scientists are able to close it remotely. So they call upon the only person who can possibly stop total chaos and annihilation from engulfing the universe: A small-framed and rather unattractive genderfluid recruit who double-majored in Secularism and Women's Studies at Berkeley College. The new recruit's lack of training proves to be irrelevant because zir innate bond with the cosmos and zir advanced emotional intelligence far surpasses any of the other UAC soldiers.
Ze is given a team of men to lead, which ze arrogantly talks down to and cucks as often as possible because men are toxic pigs and they deserve it, and although ze vehemently disagrees with wielding firearms, ze comes to terms with zir usage of them by vowing to destroy all guns after the portal has been closed. The non-shaved and non-makeup-wearing recruit easily overcomes vast legions of hellspawn and demons, whose main method of attack is trying to grab zir in the pussy, and ultimately confronts the source of the demons, the Icon of Sin, represented by a giant Donald Trump face in a wall that shoots forth demon spawning cubes from his exposed brain. By placing a well-aimed rocket blast into the brain of the evil orange-faced Hell Lord, the creature is killed and Hell itself is reduced to shambles.
The film ends with the heroic recruit becoming the de facto leader of the UAC, which after completely eradicating the white race to ensure no more bad things happen to humanity, focuses on developing new technologies which facilitate gender reassignment surgery.
|
|
technician
Doomer
Internet Hate Machine
Posts: 269
|
Post by technician on Mar 16, 2019 15:17:46 GMT -5
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2019 15:57:32 GMT -5
This Youtube comment says it all: "So this will be Ghostbusters 2016 all over again? Blame the fans and call them misogynists if they don't watch the movie. They've become too predictable" EDIT: Here's another vid. |
|
dn
Body Count: 02
the motherfucking darknation
Posts: 1,762
|
Post by dn on Mar 17, 2019 5:51:44 GMT -5
No, Linguica. You are the demons.
Then DW was a zombie.
|
|
xeepeep
Banned
Forever
Posts: 2,338 
|
Post by xeepeep on Mar 17, 2019 14:32:31 GMT -5
I've just seen this trailer and idk, it seems ok YEAH I'VE SAID IT
The female doomguy is a nice idea actually, gets you political correctness, and action movies with girls are possibly even more masculine than normal (kinda like lesbian porn XD) so my toxic Slav hypermasculinity doesn't feel endangered.
The rest seems just fine too, kinda like the first movie which I really liked. (I don't think my trash taste should still surprise you)
Like, just don't get too hateful over the whole thing since it's shit that won't change your life in any way and maybe even disconnect yourself from the video game component and treat this thing like a generic sci-fi action movie.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2019 1:07:12 GMT -5
Bob Page, that write up disgusted me. I am deeply offended. Mainly because the film you just summarized would actually be hilarious, but in reality all we're likely to get is a generic snoozefest.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2019 8:27:20 GMT -5
Aight how about when this movie hits we theme that next month's DBP around it. It'd be a bit late for April Fools but I think that'd be funny.
|
|
citation needed 
