Cringe Memories
Jul 26, 2023 6:08:11 GMT -5
Post by lunchlunch on Jul 26, 2023 6:08:11 GMT -5
Everyone is cringe sometimes, you can ruminate on it or laugh it off. I've been cringe every day of my life. I'll start off with a memory I was thinking about tonight and if you want to, you can share too, and hopefully find the humor in your cringe if you haven't already.
One day I had to give a presentation for a college class. I was a little unprepared and hated public speaking. At this point in time, I kept a pint of Sunny Brook whiskey under the driver's seat of my car and throughout the schoolday (or workday, or any day), I'd go take pulls from it every hour or two. Because I was nervous to present, I allowed myself to take more than my usual allotment, and drank half of a brand new bottle. Within minutes of walking up the steep hill to campus, it hit me harder than I was expecting. No matter, I'd just chew gum, stabilize myself against the podium, no biggie.
As I was approaching the English building, two freshman girls were making their way down the sidewalk towards me. One walking, the other slowly pumping herself alongside on a longboard. Drunk me thought it would be funny to do a quick step in front of her and then back as if to fake her out. She was moving at three miles per hour, it would be a safe, innocent goof. Well, drunk me lost his balance and dove right into this girl, knocking her to the grass and falling on top of her. She yelled "What the fuck" and I was so mortified, I don't think I said anything, I just got right up and bolted to class. But not before noticing I had been spotted by a girl in my class that I had a crush on, and that as far as she could tell, I'm just out here tackling bitches with no remorse. I spent the whole presentation stuttering and trying not to make eye contact with her.
One day I had to give a presentation for a college class. I was a little unprepared and hated public speaking. At this point in time, I kept a pint of Sunny Brook whiskey under the driver's seat of my car and throughout the schoolday (or workday, or any day), I'd go take pulls from it every hour or two. Because I was nervous to present, I allowed myself to take more than my usual allotment, and drank half of a brand new bottle. Within minutes of walking up the steep hill to campus, it hit me harder than I was expecting. No matter, I'd just chew gum, stabilize myself against the podium, no biggie.
As I was approaching the English building, two freshman girls were making their way down the sidewalk towards me. One walking, the other slowly pumping herself alongside on a longboard. Drunk me thought it would be funny to do a quick step in front of her and then back as if to fake her out. She was moving at three miles per hour, it would be a safe, innocent goof. Well, drunk me lost his balance and dove right into this girl, knocking her to the grass and falling on top of her. She yelled "What the fuck" and I was so mortified, I don't think I said anything, I just got right up and bolted to class. But not before noticing I had been spotted by a girl in my class that I had a crush on, and that as far as she could tell, I'm just out here tackling bitches with no remorse. I spent the whole presentation stuttering and trying not to make eye contact with her.
