|
Post by lunchlunch on Apr 21, 2021 22:55:46 GMT -5
40ozI don't understand the details but you might have to be selfish for a minute and hurt some feelings (politely) to take a break to breathe. @vigilantdoomer Sorry about your friendship. Ultimately you can only control your side of things, and so long as you've handled it to the best of your ability, the rest is up to them. But you can feel at peace knowing at least you did your part.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on May 31, 2021 7:28:06 GMT -5
You know, it is long overdue that I wrote some kind of post here, but even trying to put out words to describe my situation feels like a taxing job by itself. There is also concern that a lot of it cannot be shared over the internet safely, and also the fact that half of it involves politics or other subjects on which the forum is divided.
Let's start with the fact I have no trouble sharing: lockdown (curfew order in April, 2020) fucked me, and by saying it I mean lockdown, and also mandatory mask wearing, not the virus per se. I never returned to the level of physical activity and shape I had before the lockdown, and it also damaged my mental health so much I have finally sought out a therapist that prescribed me antidepressants on which I have been months by now, with no prospect of stopping them. Some discussions on this forum, where a particular member brags about how he is going to wear a mask even when it is over (will it ever fucking be?) retraumatize me. Worse yet, a lot of my friends evaded lockdown by disobeying the orders and never getting caught (very easy in Russia if you are living anywhere but in a city with million citizens), and since the hobby we have in common is long-distance running (up to 24 hour ultramarathon), I am now at very big disadvantage and can't really compete with them over any distance.
Meanwhile, geopolitics turned to an absolute horrible shitter that beats anti-utopia novels. I suddenly found myself living in a nightmare I thought I had evaded by being born in modern times, a nightmare I cannot wake up from, filled with anticipation when the worst things that have been happening to other people will finally happen to me, and I know they will. Worse yet, there are people who ignore this shit, or believe those people deserved it, or tell you to ignore it as if empathy was just some rare gift only I have, and not like, you know, a mandatory part of being human.
Perhaps this is where I'll wrap it up, for now, although far from done. I shall add also that I have been visting a psychologist every week since April, 2020 and that sessions are rather costly, yet the need for threapy will definitely persist for years, even as I remain dependent on antidepressants.
|
|
matador
You're trying to say you like DOS better than me, right?
I feel asleep.
Posts: 1,078
|
Post by matador on Jun 1, 2021 19:37:20 GMT -5
@vigilantdoomer The pandemic sucks, hopefully things improve for you when it ends, if not sooner. Regarding politics, I find that things always seem bleaker and crazier on the internet or in the news than they actually are in my day to day life. Not sure if that's in anyway germane to what's going on in your life but sometimes those sources can make it seem like fringe ideas have more sway with the average person and power than they actually do.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 2, 2021 11:01:47 GMT -5
matador, thank you, man! Yes, this shit definitely gonna end someday. I am trying to find balance between avoiding news and staying in touch with what's going on, is difficult, because what goes on is a non-stop vagon of adversity which one is powerless to fight. I've currently withdrawn from activism in real world (things I hinted at in other thread), need a break because my vision of how to help people certainly doesn't mesh with those of a group I tried to work with.
|
|
mayhemicdestrvctor
makes the posts and the roasts
I Liked Earache Better When Dig Answered The Phone
Posts: 1,779
|
Post by mayhemicdestrvctor on Dec 29, 2021 2:47:00 GMT -5
i get extremely angry every time some one posts some thing and it was posted in a thread that i didn 't create , does this happen to many people
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 29, 2021 3:51:21 GMT -5
mayhemicdestrvctor, sometimes, it may seem like some people are posting things in different topics to deflect attention from you, and maybe on a rare occassion it's true. Yes, such thoughts can occur to me but very rarely. Not every time though. Remember, for this to actually happen by intent one has to have a personal hatred for you, but even if that occurs, it is unlikely to be shared by any other member of this forum. In the end, every topic here eventually loses interest and gets sunk, so even if there is a detractor, there is no gain whatsoever for them in long run.
|
|
mayhemicdestrvctor
makes the posts and the roasts
I Liked Earache Better When Dig Answered The Phone
Posts: 1,779
|
Post by mayhemicdestrvctor on Dec 29, 2021 5:47:41 GMT -5
okay it 's just i get the feeling a lot my levels that i post or the new püroiject are made are just so bad that no really likes it i feel like an idiot
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 29, 2021 7:42:11 GMT -5
|
|
mayhemicdestrvctor
makes the posts and the roasts
I Liked Earache Better When Dig Answered The Phone
Posts: 1,779
|
Post by mayhemicdestrvctor on Dec 29, 2021 16:30:17 GMT -5
ok i don 't know if that helps or not but thx
|
|
mayhemicdestrvctor
makes the posts and the roasts
I Liked Earache Better When Dig Answered The Phone
Posts: 1,779
|
Post by mayhemicdestrvctor on Dec 29, 2021 23:28:45 GMT -5
some one here ?
|
|
Lobo
Doomer
Posts: 556
|
Post by Lobo on Dec 30, 2021 2:14:10 GMT -5
Also the user base here is very small, so that lessens the possibility of someone answering in your thread even more.
|
|
mayhemicdestrvctor
makes the posts and the roasts
I Liked Earache Better When Dig Answered The Phone
Posts: 1,779
|
Post by mayhemicdestrvctor on Dec 30, 2021 3:10:54 GMT -5
okay sorry i just realized it 's never going to get better any way i 'm sorry i could not stop my self from starting to talking about this again i will try to cry less and stop bothering people about my stuff
|
|
40oz
diRTbAg
Posts: 5,535
Member is Online
|
Post by 40oz on Dec 30, 2021 8:48:22 GMT -5
mayhemicdestrvctor oh no, bro no apologies necessary. What youre going through is very much real and youre not bothering anyone. Im really grateful for your posts, thoughts, and ideas here in the past, it was common for message boards and forums to have moderators that would drop the banhammer on people for posting too often. A lot of message boards are not very friendly so people dont post very often at all because they are afraid of coming off as annoying. I wish it didnt have to be like that but the format of message boards is dated compared to other platforms which are more instantaneous. These days message boards are more often used for quick reading. Most things are quicker and easier to use. It takes time to write something thoughtful. It would be cool if there was an easier way to gauge people's interest in your posts and topics but the format requires people to write a few sentences and paragraphs and the pool for good writing is getting shallower and shallower. Hang in there my dude. Even when youre not getting the responses you were hoping for, I swear youre helping some people if there are this many people causually browsing this forum.
|
|
good-old
Doomer
17 year old dumb kid. It's good-old, not Good-Old.
Posts: 338
|
Post by good-old on Dec 30, 2021 9:33:08 GMT -5
Most of the time I don't reply to posts, it's because I have nothing to say and/or don't know anything about the topic(For example, topics of games I haven't played in the Games subforum) I agree with 40oz in that you don't need to apologize. IMO you helped by pointing out an issue this forum has. I've been off from discord for around 2 months now which is probably my record time not visiting that site(it used to be my daily website)so I'll try to spend that time to post more here instead. It'd be a shame if a community like this had 3 posts a day for most of the time, I sorta hope to change that now that this is my daily website.
|
|
40oz
diRTbAg
Posts: 5,535
Member is Online
|
Post by 40oz on Dec 30, 2021 10:55:26 GMT -5
in the past, it was common for message boards and forums to have moderators that would drop the banhammer on people for posting too often. A lot of message boards are not very friendly so people dont post very often at all because they are afraid of coming off as annoying. I should rephrase this. It's not about posting too often, but rather too much "low-quality" posting. (incomplete thoughts, sentence fragments, bad spelling/grammar, too many acronyms) It was once perceived that forums should be a sophisticated place where users should be mindful that their contributions are meant to be read and easy to digest. That your writing should be informative, compelling, entertaining, humorous, etc. This was at a time where message boards were a major communication channel over the internet and social media wasn't really a thing yet, so message boards sometimes had many hundreds of active members posting on it daily, and there was a lot of uninteresting stuff to have to scroll past. For that reason, you don't often see people posting things for basic responsive communication like "interesting" or "coo1!" or "ok" because in the past this would be perceived as clogging up the forums with needless posts that are of little interest to the general community. However, I think we've outlived that stage. It's nice that people take the time to write thoughtful articulate posts, but this is a small forum and sometimes it feels like ideas are not being received (or deliberately ignored/chided) if people aren't responding when you write something you put a lot of thought into.
|
|
|
Post by joe-ilya on Dec 30, 2021 17:46:14 GMT -5
okay it 's just i get the feeling a lot my levels that i post or the new püroiject are made are just so bad that no really likes it i feel like an idiot Your maps are meh and I've already commented on one of your threads, the other mapset threads that you've made I played too but I had the same criticism to say, so I didn't say anything, especially with how quick you make these threads. Until you improve or change, no one will have anything to say about your maps, because it feels like you're either not listening or lazy, because your maps don't evolve to anything more than chunky maps that stick to the 32px grid, with over-reliance on the shotgun or the super shotgun.
|
|
mayhemicdestrvctor
makes the posts and the roasts
I Liked Earache Better When Dig Answered The Phone
Posts: 1,779
|
Post by mayhemicdestrvctor on Dec 30, 2021 18:25:21 GMT -5
mayhemicdestrvctor oh no, bro no apologies necessary. What youre going through is very much real and youre not bothering anyone. Im really grateful for your posts, thoughts, and ideas here in the past, it was common for message boards and forums to have moderators that would drop the banhammer on people for posting too often. A lot of message boards are not very friendly so people dont post very often at all because they are afraid of coming off as annoying. I wish it didnt have to be like that but the format of message boards is dated compared to other platforms which are more instantaneous. These days message boards are more often used for quick reading. Most things are quicker and easier to use. It takes time to write something thoughtful. It would be cool if there was an easier way to gauge people's interest in your posts and topics but the format requires people to write a few sentences and paragraphs and the pool for good writing is getting shallower and shallower. Hang in there my dude. Even when youre not getting the responses you were hoping for, I swear youre helping some people if there are this many people causually browsing this forum.
thanks then i 'm going to try mapping much more (:
|
|
mayhemicdestrvctor
makes the posts and the roasts
I Liked Earache Better When Dig Answered The Phone
Posts: 1,779
|
Post by mayhemicdestrvctor on Dec 30, 2021 18:27:05 GMT -5
Your maps are meh and I've already commented on one of your threads, the other mapset threads that you've made I played too but I had the same criticism to say, so I didn't say anything, especially with how quick you make these threads. Until you improve or change, no one will have anything to say about your maps, because it feels like you're either not listening or lazy, because your maps don't evolve to anything more than chunky maps that stick to the 32px grid, with over-reliance on the shotgun or the super shotgun. in the last version of the doom2 remaking wad i removed all the details and replaced themn with 16x or 8x details and you didn 't even look at it after i updatedr the post and i even placed a rocket launcher and lots of rockets there and so many monsters that it is the better choice to user the rocket launcher in that one
|
|
|
Post by ketmar on Dec 31, 2021 9:45:03 GMT -5
okay sorry i just realized it 's never going to get better any way i 'm sorry i could not stop my self from starting to talking about this again i will try to cry less and stop bothering people about my stuff hey, don't worry! ;-) your intentions are good, and your enthusiasm is great, and this matters a lot. there is nothing wrong with you, or with your posts/actions. it just happens sometimes — sometimes things aren't going the way you want them to go. don't take it too personal. ;-) i know that i'm not very good at giving support, but i tried my best. hope that helps at least a little.
|
|
mayhemicdestrvctor
makes the posts and the roasts
I Liked Earache Better When Dig Answered The Phone
Posts: 1,779
|
Post by mayhemicdestrvctor on Dec 31, 2021 10:57:12 GMT -5
okay just don 't derail my posts again that was just hurting me
|
|
mayhemicdestrvctor
makes the posts and the roasts
I Liked Earache Better When Dig Answered The Phone
Posts: 1,779
|
Post by mayhemicdestrvctor on Jan 5, 2022 23:46:12 GMT -5
can some one talk to me
|
|
good-old
Doomer
17 year old dumb kid. It's good-old, not Good-Old.
Posts: 338
|
Post by good-old on Jan 6, 2022 3:46:05 GMT -5
I've seen a total of 5 people there. Myself, ketmar who is almost always there(he stays there even longer than I do), and occasionally vigilantdoomer. Lobo visited it some time ago but got bored due to the lack of activity I guess. There's also smalk who is probably a lurker here, he got bored as well. So pretty much two and a half people but talk isn't that frequent, only once a week or so. Ofc it's quite appreciated if someone starts talking, talks aren't ignored, just that they aren't started often.
|
|
mayhemicdestrvctor
makes the posts and the roasts
I Liked Earache Better When Dig Answered The Phone
Posts: 1,779
|
Post by mayhemicdestrvctor on Jan 6, 2022 5:14:07 GMT -5
what program can i use for that
|
|
good-old
Doomer
17 year old dumb kid. It's good-old, not Good-Old.
Posts: 338
|
Post by good-old on Jan 6, 2022 8:58:19 GMT -5
Here's a list.If you can't decide, I suggest using Hexchat. Or if you aren't willing to install a program for it, use WebIRC or KiwiIRC.
|
|
mayhemicdestrvctor
makes the posts and the roasts
I Liked Earache Better When Dig Answered The Phone
Posts: 1,779
|
Post by mayhemicdestrvctor on Jan 7, 2022 1:36:27 GMT -5
ok thx
|
|